Feedback Can Create the Ultimate Win-Win Situation

“When I give performance feedback to employees, I want them to listen to what I’m saying. If they argue, get defensive, or give me body language that indicates a bad attitude, I’m not going to waste any more of my time. If they mess up again, I’ll just fire them.”

Is that the gospel according to Donald Trump or is it Simon Cowell sounding off on American Idol?  Neither. It’s your garden-variety supervisor, manager, or business owner.

“I don’t bother giving feedback anymore”, says a local supervisor, “because it backfires. The employee takes it personally, sulks, whispers to friends about how unreasonable, biased, or mean I am, and ends up doing a worse job than before.  What’s my solution? I avoid the discussion and advertise for a replacement.”

Think that person’s alone? Catch this…

“Give feedback. Are you kidding? I’d rather have a root canal! The women cry, the men argue, the teenagers shrug and say, ‘whatever’. I end up doing their jobs and mine, working late and on weekends. I have so much turnover here you’d think we manufactured spatulas.”

Is there a flip side to the story? Absolutely.

“My boss is such a micromanager I want to quit. I mean, why bother? Everything I do he changes, corrects, and critiques. He hasn’t complimented me since I’ve been here. Once I told him. ‘Mr. Jones’, I said, (that’s not really his name) ‘ I try really hard to please you and do everything you ask me to do. You never tell me I’m doing a good job.’ You know what he said? He said, ‘Amy (that’s not my name either), I shouldn’t have to praise you for what I’m paying you to do.’  Then, he said, all angry, ‘Why are you wasting my time with this nonsense? Get back to work.’ Do you believe it?”

This is from a mid level supervisor at a local manufacturing plant:

“I have a good boss and I know he means well. He just doesn’t know how to give feedback. He tells me what to do instead of asking me to solve the problem myself. He’s old school, doesn’t give praise, yet he’s always telling us how his boss doesn’t appreciate him, that he’d like a ‘thank you’ every so often. He’s under a lot of pressure at work and has a lot on him at home, too. His boss is tough on him, micro-manages him, and he turns around and micro-manages us. We’ve had cut backs and there’s no telling when the head office will announce more. I cut him slack more than others do because I know him better than most. He’s real private, and stays away from his employees unless he has reason to come out of his office which usually is because someone’s messed up and he’s going to yell at them. I’m glad I’m not in his shoes, but if I were, I believe I could do a better job managing people than he does.”

And finally, an example that makes working for someone worth the effort:

“I learned a long time ago that if you want to bring out the best in people you match their strengths to where they can do the best job. When they succeed, I succeed, and the company does well. That keeps us all employed. I call that the ultimate win.

I’ve learned to give employees immediate and specific feedback when they do a good job, and give them immediate specific feedback when they miss out on an opportunity to do something well. I involve them in solving problems because they’re the ones who have the responsibility for getting the job done right. I train and develop them to do more; to think tactically as well as strategically.  I give them opportunities to think independently and at the same time teach them the necessity of succeeding as a team.

It doesn’t always work. Sometimes the match isn’t there. When that happens, despite my best intentions, feedback, and counsel, I’ve learned to manage the person out of the department, sometimes out of the company, and into something that makes better sense for who they are, not who I want them to be.”

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Yes! You may use this article in your blog, newsletter or website as long as you include the following bio box:

Joyce Richman (www.richmanresources.com) has been specializing in executive and career coaching since 1982. She works in a variety of environments including: higher education, manufacturing, sales, marketing, media, technology, pharmaceuticals, medicine, banking and finance, service, IT, and non-profit sectors. A member of the adjunct faculty at the Center for Creative Leadership, Joyce is certified to administer a number of feedback and psychological instruments. Joyce is a weekly guest on WFMY-TV and the career columnist for The Greensboro News & Record. She is the author of Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook to Career Success and co-author of Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job. A popular speaker, Richman conducts seminars and workshops throughout the United States, Canada and Europe. Her coaching profile can be found at www.thecoachingassociation.com.

Rejoining Your Life After an Unexpected Layoff

I bet you know him. He goes to work early and stays late. He’s known as a company man. He’s dedicated, loyal, with a work ethic that challenges the most diligent. His only fear is failing health even though he’s never taken a sick day. (He’s never had a day that he stayed out sick. He’s had several sick days.)

He’s just been laid off and never saw it coming.

He was starting to think about retirement. Not that he wanted to, but he was losing his edge; slower than he liked, more forgetful, less enthusiastic. It took energy to be enthusiastic. He’d need to save his energy for nights that he worked late.

Retirement’s gone. He’s been laid off. Now he needs to get a job.

***

If this sounds familiar, it is, and you’re not alone. The good news is, you can get your bearings, you can figure this out if you use your time and energy wisely and think differently than you have before. To get the next job you’ll need to connect with people you haven’t paid attention to in a very long while.

Rejoin your family. You need them to welcome you home. You’ll need to be as vital to them as you’ll soon find they are to you. You’ll want to have a place to be and a role to play. You’ll need to be a wise listener; an empowering husband, and an encouraging father. You want to learn about their life’s lessons, their struggles, and their successes so they’ll want to care about yours.

Take your time and stay the course. It won’t happen overnight. You worked your way out of their lives, you’ll have to earn your way back in, one day at a time.

Rejoin your community. Learn how to connect so you’ll know where to contribute. When you combine who you naturally are, with what you inherently do, and where that combination is needed most, and you give fully of yourself, you will get more in return than you can possibly anticipate.

Expand your thinking. When is the last time you read a book because you wanted to? If it’s been a long time (or you’ve never been a reader) you’re in for quite a surprise. There’s a world of information waiting for you. Explore and experience learning where other people go to learn. Go to the library, go back to school, go to a play, go to concert, google.

Take care of your heart, your head and your feet. If you’ve avoided check-ups because doctors tell you what you don’t want to hear, check-in. Tell them you’re ready to listen. And if they say it’s OK, lace up your shoes and take a brisk walk. Walk alongside babies in strollers, and dogs on leashes. Wave at children on swings and families on cookouts.

There are extraordinary ordinary people in this world who are ready and willing to assist you in your job search if you will let them know that they are important to you. Not because of what they do, but because of who they are.

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Yes! You may use this article in your blog, newsletter or website as long as you include the following bio box:

Joyce Richman (www.richmanresources.com) has been specializing in executive and career coaching since 1982. She works in a variety of environments including: higher education, manufacturing, sales, marketing, media, technology, pharmaceuticals, medicine, banking and finance, service, IT, and non-profit sectors. A member of the adjunct faculty at the Center for Creative Leadership, Joyce is certified to administer a number of feedback and psychological instruments. Joyce is a weekly guest on WFMY-TV and the career columnist for The Greensboro News & Record. She is the author of Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook to Career Success and co-author of Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job. A popular speaker, Richman conducts seminars and workshops throughout the United States, Canada and Europe. Her coaching profile can be found at www.thecoachingassociation.com.

Don’t Just Work Hard and Be Smart: Work Smart!

Carolyn (not her real name) comes to work tied up in knots and goes home the same way. She’s worried that she won’t have enough time to get her job done. She’s worried that someone will ask her a question that she can’t answer. She’s worried that she’ll never be as smart as she needs to be.

If Carolyn were the only victim of her angst, that would be difficult enough. But she isn’t. Everyone who comes into contact with her is affected:

• Her boss. Carolyn is temperamental, so he treats her with kid gloves. No matter how careful he is when making a request, asking questions or providing feedback, he ends up feeling like the heavy. He doesn’t like the feeling.
• Her peers. Carolyn insists on working in a quiet space. If they talk loudly, she looks angry. If they whisper to not distract her, she looks suspicious. They feel like they have to tiptoe around her. They don’t like the feeling.
• Her direct reports. Carolyn micro manages and second-guesses everything they do. They feel intimidated and inadequate. They don’t like the feeling.

When Carolyn was in college she was long on honors and short on friends. She avoided anything and anyone that got in the way of her studies. Whatever she learned didn’t include managing her emotions or her relationships.

How has she remained so insensitive to the effect she has on others? Everyone just kept their collective mouths shut.

Her parents: “Leave Carolyn alone. You know how difficult smart children can be.”

Her teachers: “Carolyn is very intense and emotional, like many gifted students. People will learn to work around her and accept her as she is.”

The problem is, they haven’t and they won’t.

What’s Carolyn’s take on all this?

“I work harder than anyone else in this company. I come in earlier and stay later and take work home when I leave. I work every weekend and still worry that I won’t get it all done.

I know that people resent me. It’s obvious. But if I allow myself to be influenced by that, I’ll fail at my job. Doing my work right is more important to me than being popular.

I’m too intense? Well, I guess so! Wouldn’t you be? Now, get out of my way, I have work to do.”

Sorry, Carolyn. Despite your commitment to excellence, you are ineffective. Being smart, hardworking and focused just doesn’t cut it if no one is willing to work with you. Unless you learn how to behave differently and act upon what you learn, you’re going to be on your own. Completely.

What can Carolyn do? If she knew, she’d probably be doing it.

So Carolyn, (or Caleb, Carl or Carla) here’s a crash course in business savvy:

Stop worrying about what you can’t control. Focus on what you can. You will never get it all done or have the answers to questions that may never be asked. And if you are spending your time trying to do both, you’re spreading yourself thin and wearing yourself out.

Are you saying “yes” to the wrong things and saying “no” to the wrong people? What are your boss’s priorities? If you don’t know, don’t assume. Ask. Your productivity should correspond to your boss’s expectations of you, not what you think those expectations should be.

Are you making your boss’s requests into something more complex than he intends? Simplify. Unnecessary complexity begets complication that can gum up the works and increase everyone’s tension levels. You end up wasting time with needless delays and pointless headaches.

Are you carrying more of the load than anyone should? Who’s putting it there? If it’s your subordinates, you may be the one extending the invitation. When your do-more attitude collides with their do-less behavior, you end up doing it all. Bad idea. Learn how to delegate. Learn what to delegate. Learn to provide honest and timely feedback to those who do it well and those who need to do it better.

If you only remember one thing, remember this: People won’t remember you as working the hardest or being the smartest. You’ll be remembered for how well you played the game and how well you treated your teammates along the way.

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Yes! You may use this article in your blog, newsletter or website as long as you include the following bio box:

Joyce Richman (www.richmanresources.com) has been specializing in executive and career coaching since 1982. She works in a variety of environments including: higher education, manufacturing, sales, marketing, media, technology, pharmaceuticals, medicine, banking and finance, service, IT, and non-profit sectors. A member of the adjunct faculty at the Center for Creative Leadership, Joyce is certified to administer a number of feedback and psychological instruments. Joyce is a weekly guest on WFMY-TV and the career columnist for The Greensboro News & Record. She is the author of Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook to Career Success and co-author of Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job. A popular speaker, Richman conducts seminars and workshops throughout the United States, Canada and Europe. Her coaching profile can be found at www.thecoachingassociation.com.

Thinking of Making a Career Change?

You may have friends who changed careers when it didn’t look like they needed to. You may have wondered what gave them the courage to believe they could start over, doing something they’d never done before. You may have marveled at their immense pride in even modest success.

“Could you do that?”

You may have known others who walked away from seemingly comfortable careers and life styles to follow a dream. Their stories didn’t end as well. They lost their savings and worked several jobs just to pay bills. They’re miserable.

“Could that happen to you?”

How come it works for some and not for others?

The most successful career changers take the time necessary to know what they’re leaving and why they should. They know where they’re going and most of the steps it takes to get there. They’re emotionally prepared (as one can be) for personal and professional setbacks. They are sufficiently capitalized to get through start up without having to compromise their basic savings. They are calculated risk-taking optimists with one eye on the future and the other on the road.

Successful transition begins with self-awareness: an ability to objectively evaluate your state of being in conjunction with your state of doing. In other words:

Are you well matched to your work?

You perform tasks and interact with people. Do you have a proper balance between the two? Do you need more of one and less of the other?

What do you value most about what you do, where you do it, and who you do it with? How do your values compare to those demonstrated by your business leaders?

Are you optimistic about your career’s future? Do you believe that your area of specialization will continue to be in demand?

Are you doing what you need to keep pace by taking essential courses, reading, and learning from others?

Your continued career satisfaction is enhanced by your ability to objectively respond to the above and to determine where you stand.

It’s not unusual to find that people can be well matched to their work, share values with their organization, have the proper mix of tasks and people in their workday, believe their career’s future to be relatively safe, and still be unhappy.

How do you fare when you put these into the mix:

Recognition. Are you acknowledged for your work effort? Are you fairly compensated? Are you perceived as accountable as well as promotable?

Economic security. Are you concerned about your financial future? Do you fear that your company will be closed or purchased by a company with deeper pockets?

Control. Does your authority match up to your responsibility? Are you second-guessed or micro-managed? Conversely, are you pushed beyond your capacity in both your role and your learning curve?

Belonging. Do you feel that you are an essential player on a well managed team? Does the team communicate effectively and synergistically? Are managers communicating directly and honestly? Do you agree with the direction the company is taking?

What do you have in your career that you want to keep? What are you missing that you want to have? What questions do you have that you want to have answered?

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Yes! You may use this article in your blog, newsletter or website as long as you include the following bio box:

Joyce Richman (www.richmanresources.com) has been specializing in executive and career coaching since 1982. She works in a variety of environments including: higher education, manufacturing, sales, marketing, media, technology, pharmaceuticals, medicine, banking and finance, service, IT, and non-profit sectors. A member of the adjunct faculty at the Center for Creative Leadership, Joyce is certified to administer a number of feedback and psychological instruments. Joyce is a weekly guest on WFMY-TV and the career columnist for The Greensboro News & Record. She is the author of Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook to Career Success and co-author of Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job. A popular speaker, Richman conducts seminars and workshops throughout the United States, Canada and Europe. Her coaching profile can be found at www.thecoachingassociation.com.

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